Happy late Mother’s Day to all the mamas out there!
I know, if you’re like me, you’re probably extremely worn out and exhausted from chasing around the kiddos, giving baths, making dinner, etc. Except right now I don’t do much of any of that—because of what’s going on with me medically—so technically Klay should be wished Happy Mother’s Day; he’s definitely taken on the role of both parents.
Did you ever really think about what it would be like having kids? I mean like really, really think about it?
Looking back now, no one ever really sat down and told me how hard of a job it is being a parent. I mean, my parents said it was hard and so did other parents, but DAMN I didn’t know it was this damn hard. As a teenager, I probably would have rolled my eyes and not listened to what they said anyway.
It’s safe to say we all got that “just wait until you have kids” line over the years. I know I had a fair share of those thrown my way. And, she was right.
Yes, Mom, you were right; there I said it! LOL.
If you’re like me, you now understand what she meant when she said that to you—because now you know what it’s like being a parent.
And it’s exhausting, frustrating, tiring, tough, and your life will never be the same after you become parents.
I’m not sugar-coating it here. I’m just being real honest. Sometimes I question if I was meant to be a parent because there are just times I really suck at it or go hide my closet and lose my shit. #whoiswithme
It is the most difficult job ever—eeeeeeevvvvverrrrr.
It’s never-ending—the constant worries about their health and safety, questioning yourself on how to discipline, wondering if you are a good parent and you’re kids enjoy you, hoping you’re doing what you can to help them learn and grow, and praying that they are happy children who think you’re doing a good job—and hopefully they will feel that same way when they’re older and think back to their childhood.
I’m definitely not the “Mother Of The Year” or even close to it. I’m not even sure I’d get a participation ribbon for trying—and that hurts sometimes.
There is so much pressure—especially with social media—to be the “Pinterest Mom” or the “Head of the PTA Mom.” And as much as I’d love to do the cool things Pinterest moms are doing with their kids when I’ve tried, I get frustrated and the activity turns into a headache or a scene from Mommy Dearest. OK not that bad; thankfully I don’t have a thing about wire hangers… lol
Anyway during the activity—that only kept their attention for three to four minutes—I’m now in a pissed off mood, frustrated, the house looks like Martha Stewart took a big craft-dump in it, and all I want to do now is take a nap.
I wish as a mom I had more patience, more energy, and could play more with the kids outside.
But I can’t and I’m not. I often snap at my kids. I get tired of having to put people in corners or explain why it’s important for you to sleep in your bed and not with mommy and daddy every night. I get extremely agitated with what feels like constant high-pitched screaming and it all just wears me out.
At times, I feel like I’m constantly failing.
But in reality, I feel like I haven’t been a mother at all. Klay’s assumed that role and if it’s not Klay than it’s my mom, who is over here almost every day during the week helping me take care of the kids.