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WATCHING: 13 Reasons Why

I watched this right when it came out. My friend read it and said it was pretty good, but it was more for teenagers and what not. She even said some of the stuff I went through in high school was as bad or worse than what the girl in the show goes through. I thought it was a pretty good show, but I thought some of her “reasons” to kill herself were kind of dumb. But at the same time, when you’re in high school day-to-day, it never seems like the pain will go away from being bullied or gossiped about. It’s an interesting show.

EATING: Outshine Raspberry Popsicles

This shit is the bomb.com ya’ll! I love them. They are so fruity and have so much flavor, they are addicting.

DRINKING: More Water (or trying to)

I think it’s safe to say I’m an addict; a caffeine addict that is. And well, that means most of the time I’d rather pop open a coke than having a glass of water. But I’m really trying to drink more H2O and hoping it will make me feel better.

CHALLENGED BY: My body

I don’t get it. Time and time again I see myself overcoming a rough month due to health complications, and thinking I’m on the up and up, and then I see myself tumbling down passing all of my progress because my body can’t get its shit together. The everyday pain I’m experiencing is excruciating and it’s constant. When I’m in bed, opening the car door, getting out of the car, sitting down on a chair, sitting down to fast, and putting on clothes, it hurts. My body has made me disabled. I’m not able to do ordinary, everyday tasks anymore. I just want my body to get better. I need some relief.
confetti eggs kids

APPRECIATING: Spending time with my kids & family on Easter

You all pretty much know that the past 6 weeks or so have really kicked my ass. Unexpected medical issues and two hospital stays in a matter of weeks has caused me to be a bit off-balance.
So being home on Easter and watching my family throw confetti eggs at each other was pretty awesome.
Hopefully next year, I’ll be able to be up, chasing the kids around and throwing confetti eggs at the people I love.confetti eggs easter

LISTENING: To Sia

I pretty much love about 90% of Sia’s music. She has such a unique and amazing voice—plus incredible songwriting skills. I apply a lot of her music to what is going on in my life. One of my faves is “Bird Set Free.” Go and give it a listen. 

READING: About podcasting

I’m trying to start a podcast as some of you know. So, I’m gearing up by reading and learning more about podcasting, the equipment needed, and programs to use, etc. Hoping something will be live soon!

WONDERING: Where the time went

Brody had his Kindergarten Roundup this month, and I’m blown away that his first day of school is only a few months away. It’s crazy to think it’s been five years since he was born, six since we left Alaska, and nearly 10 years since we got married. Life moves so fast, yet so slow at the same time.
I know that when Bro’s first day of school comes around, I’m going to be a basket case. Let’s just hope I’m not in the hospital and I’m feeling much better than I do right now.

READY: To feel inspired and excited about life again

It’s disheartening going through so much at once. I mean the past two years have been a whirlwind of ups and downs, but now I’m supposed to be getting better, and I feel like I’m way worse than I was before. This obviously has an impact on me emotionally. I’m sad and I feel guilty for everything. It sucks feeling like crap and needing Klay to come help me up off the toilet because my muscles in my legs are being assholes.

So, I’ve been down, upset, and angry at life and the world. I hate feeling that way. I hate feeling like all I’m doing is dragging people down to an unfortunate and fated outcome.

I just want to know that I’m doing something to help people or make them feel better about their lives and remember to never take things for granted. If I’m going to do some good and make a difference out of this shitty situation, then I need to feel inspired and uplifted again. And then I need to someone to tell me how I can help people, and what I’m supposed to be doing because right now, I feel like a no good, useless person that is doing nothing but causing people pain and interrupting their lives. So I’m searching for inspiration…

Crossing my fingers for better days,

lifeoncasslane signature

2 Comments

  1. I really enjoy posts like these – some of my favorite bloggers will do a Day in the Life post where they show all they did thru the day – I watched episode 1 of 13 Reasons last night, this show is not my typical show but I’ve heard so many raving about it. I’m a professional Netflix binge watcher so I’m going to give it a shot.
    I love the Outshine Strawberry bars, thanks for the tip on the raspberry. I will give them a try. I bought the Kroger version of the strawberry Outshine bars and I like them better than the real thing. There seems to be more fruit chunky in the Kroger brand.
    I’m excited about your podcast – as I’m about to type this I realize that I need to get a life. I admitted above to being a professional tv binge watcher, you know I love blogs, and now I will confess that I love podcasts. I have a really long commute though, so does that make it better? I can’t stop, won’t stop with the podcasts – or the Netflix or the blogs.
    I want you to know that when I saw you the other night at Kindergarten Roundup I was so happy. I find your strength so uplifting and your love and want for your kids is so moving. I really value the voice that you using to bring awareness. My Mom is a three time breast cancer survivor and my best friend is still battling uterine cancer. You’ve opened my eyes up to the needs and thoughts of so many.

    • Yolanda, let me know what you think of the show. I’m still ehh, but I wanted to get to the nitty gritty of it all to try to understand the reasons behind her suicide.

      I’m so glad you listen to podcasts! I’m trying to decide on my name right now… But I’m not sure what to call it, because I want it to make people who’ve never heard it, give it a listen. Let me know if you have any ideas!

      I was so happy to see you the other day too. I can’t believe the kids are getting so big. I honestly don’t feel like I’m strong or even uplifting. I see myself as kind of negative Nancy right now. I don’t know. Life is hard for me right now. I’m glad others are seeing it as inspiration though. That’s my goal is to raise awareness and make a difference. Any suggestions on future blog posts? I like the day in the life idea. I guess I haven’t really found many bloggers who do that now. Mostly because they are about making money. Anyway, let me know if you think of anything! Thank you for commenting and supporting us! We love you!

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