I haven’t written this month, like I promised I would–and I’m sorry about that.
Honestly this month, it’s been one thing after another.
Remember how I told you that I would have these days where I’d stand or walk and then I’d see all black?
Well that’s what started happening again Halloween weekend. I honestly wore myself out from Halloween–and the stress of getting the kids’ costumes ready–so much so, that the next day I was too sore and weak to get out of bed.
All of these fatigue and vision problems fell right before this random Monday where I had to watch the kids alone. Perfect timing, right?
I was really scared to keep the boys all alone all day with how I felt.
That day, I’d stand up to get something for the kids and I would black out and desperately reach out for the nearest sturdy object so I wouldn’t pass out or fall.
Besides the vision issues, I couldn’t walk a straight line to save my life. My balance was completely off that when I would try to walk one direction, my body would go in another.
Now these things have happened off and on for a while. But this particular symptom–didn’t happen until Monday, Nov. 2–the day I was alone with kids. I starting hearing my heartbeat in my ears.
I spoke to the doctor’s office and they said come in immediately, or if it kept happening I’d need to call 911. The problem was I had the kids.
Klay was nearly two hours away working. And all my immediate caregivers happened to be tied up (vacations, picking up kids from school, etc).
Klay made it home about 4 p.m. and we needed to get to the hospital and fast. We arrived at my doctor’s office who were waiting for me, because my doctor wanted to check on me personally.
They thought I was having some vertigo issues (where you sit and your BP is fine and then you stand and it drops) making the room spin or get dizzy, which I did have some of.
I’d already had CT scan of both my brain and sinuses the week prior, but they definitely wanted me to stay to do some more testing.
So I was in the hospital the first week of November, and the MRI revealed that my sinuses were terribly blocked and full.
Apparently there was a lot of gunk stuck up there that needed to be sucked out. And if you’re grossed out by that sentence, at least you didn’t have to have the sinus surgery to remove it. Yes, I said sinus surgery.
I was in pretty bad pain after the surgery. I was hurting so bad and they couldn’t keep me comfortable. I had a
rude recovery nurse, who would just ignore me when I spoke or tried to ask questions. I was in recovery for nearly two hours, and I was not happy about it.
Then, they moved my bed out by the nurses’ station and I was trying to wave or get my nurse’s attention–who was apparently done with me–and then a nurse saw I was about to yak and she handed me a nice blue barf bag. I’d swallowed a lot of blood because of the type of surgery, so you can imagine what was in the bag.
Scariest thing ever. Am I dying over here? Scary movie-type shit.
When I Thought I Saw…
I was wheeled down to get a MRI, when I see the MRI Tech guy. I’m asking myself ‘who does this guy look like?’ He was adorable. I finally realized he looked exactly like Morgan (Lenny James) from “The Walking Dead.”
I arrived back at my room and squealed to Klay with excitement “guess who I just saw?”
He replied, “Who?”
“Lenny James!” I hollered.
“WHO?” Klay said to me with an I’ve-never-heard-that-name-in-my-life look.
He stared at me.
“Morgan from ‘The Walking Dead’. You know that show we watch every Sunday and yesterday’s episode was all about him?”
“Ohhhh. That’s cool. He’s here?”
“No it was a guy that looked exactly like him though.”
I guess it’s the littlest things that excite you in a hospital.
I spent a total of five days in the hospital, but my readers weren’t far from my mind.
Y’all, I have eight posts written and saved in my drafts folder that aren’t finished yet or need some major editing.
It doesn’t help that I need glasses and I’m on drugs–pharmaceutical ones–so literally I’ve fallen asleep typing–totally face to key board.
I’m trying to get posts out as often as I can without looking like a complete fool, which means I won’t publish it unless I think someone else may want to read it.
Since my brain is so clogged up, please feel free to message me or comment and let me know I missed a word, wrote it twice, etc. I need you little editors to help me out there! #writerswithcancerstruggles
Let’s just pray that I get through these holiday months with no more hospital stays!